The Discipline Of Fire And Demise...

I started to have this pain in my throat since last saturday. Thought was just some normal throat pain... Until last night...

Yesterday was bad. Class was cancelled, but i still went to school with hye yung, asri and "wuzie" to do work, and after that, catch a movie with my girl. Yea, it was "The Simpsons". I seriously laughed my ass off la... My girl was worse, she couldn't stop laughing, the kind where its infectious and funny.... Haha.

After the show ended, i started to feel the uncomfort. I thought i was just feeling cold, so my girl asked if i'd like to take a smoke. (Thats one of the most surprising thing in my life, that she'll ask me this. I was kinda... Touched.) So i went ahead, and it felt no better. Hour by hour, i get more and more giddy, and my body aches like hell. In addition to that, i suspect that i'm down with tonsilitis. Its something that a food-lover wont wanna get. I got it twice in my life so far, and i hope this is the last time.

Last night, i got fever. A very bad one, and i was still outside. So i accompanied my girl back home, and she gave me medicine. I felt much better after one hour.

Woke up this morning, and i thought the illness is over. I came back home from school, and took a short nap. After i woke up, i was burning hot again. I was very worried that i'm down with dengue again. Its something that i can't afford to get again. I couldn't take it anymore, so i went to see the doc's.

After the checkup, it was confirmed that i got tonsilitis, and thats the reason for the fever. Phew... But now i'm still suffering la... =(

This week has been good and bad, in regards to everything revolving around me.

Classes have been quite slack, cos its the first week.

Again, Zhen Hong "chut" pattern. He was presenting his powerpoint today. He was supposed to read the word "Organism", but the word "Orgasm" came out from his mouth by mistake. The whole class laughed like mad. Edwin even took out his glasses to wipe his tears away. HAHA...

Well nothing much to say, as pictures will speak for me.



This was drawn on microsoft paint in Lily's class, cos i was kinda bored...



Went to the exhibition in my school today, and this really caught my eye. Its about the evolutions of life and death, the disintegration of living things. Very nice...



This is some art piece, using very fine materials like sand. It looks like some form of embroidery.



A close up view for that one...



Was on my way sending my girl back home, when we saw this cute lil frog on the pathway. Haha... Damn cute la! It didn't move when we used the long grass to poke it. My girl kept on laughing when i did that. Haha...



The frog looks like its posing for the camera. Look at how wide its smile is.... =)

Ok thats it for today.

Yea there goes my 4 months of long break, and today was the first day of my Year 3 in NAFA.

Felt great to be able to "reunite" with them, never felt boring with them. Haha... Kool la. First day, den kena funny things already. Teck Seng cut his hair, Ah hong lost his specs due to some funny incident, Seek bought doughnuts for the class and Yung looked like she went for some extreme make-over. She's like, chao tah now la. Darker skin than me. And she went to perm her hair... Haha...

Went to jalan jalan after class with TS, Seek and Asri at Sim lim to find TS's game. After that, walked towards bugis street area on the way back. I finally saw the kind of berms i wanna buy!!! Woo! Gonna go head down there tomorrow man...

Just finished downloading Iced Earth's "Overture Of The Wicked", an EP revamping their older album "Something Wicked This Way Comes". First things first.. I really dislike the recording. There's too much bass that i couldn't hear the guitar notes. And secondly... I still prefer Matthew Barlow being their vocalist. His vocals are damn good, helluva better than the current one. Dunno why he left the band though, its a total waste. The new guy really can't sing their older songs la. No kick at all... Lucky i didn't buy that EP sia. Waste money...

Ok thats all for now...

Went to get my Behemoth CD at far east today, as the shipment has arrived. The album art looks great, especially the back of it. I really love the back of the album art... Love it like mad! Haha... To me, Behemoth will always be labelled "The Demons Of Metal". That title used to belong to Immortal, but i feel that they're deteriorating as albums go by...

'Twas a last minute decision to go watch the movie "Alone". Was a sad thing that my girl couldn't make it. Sigh. But oh well, went on with the plan. It was about 7pm when we bought the tickets, and the show only screens at 12 midnight. So yea...

We headed for dinner at BK, and i admit that i had cravings for it. Enjoyed the meal, and it felt great cos its quite a rare thing that all of us could get together at the same time. Headed to peace centre since it was still damn early. Wanted to play pool, but the place changed into some KTV pub. Headed to the place for billiard, and the whole bloody place changed into a pool area. But fuck... First of all, it was fully packed. Secondly... The rate is crazy. $8.40 per hour. Might as well play at Pool Junction right? So in the end, made our way back to The Cathay. Went into Gramophone, and spent time there. As Aaron wanted to withdraw cash from his bank, i tagged along with him to the main entrance to get it. On our way to the ATM... Something made my heart jumped. No its not really a pleasant thing, nor an unpleasant one. Shan't explain on that one... Sigh. So yea... He got his movie, and we just slacked outside The Cathay till around 11.

Headed back to PS cos Dennis wanted to pick his girl up. And yes, for the first time, he brought his girl out with us. This should happen more frequently, and i'm sure all of us would agree with that. It wouldn't be that bad also to let my girl befriend his girl. It'll make things easier right? Haha... That day would come soon i'm sure, so dennis, don't be so uptight about it. Haha...

Went up to get tidbits for the movie, and we went in...

I swear, this show is the only show in my life that made me jump out of horror thrice, and not out of "peek-a-boo". And i swear, its that good. This show is what i truly call "A Horror Film". It is really a good movie, and its really worth the money. Very disturbing, so, its not for the faint hearted. It kicks ass! I'd rate it 5 out of 5 stars.

Alright, and after the movie, we took NR6 back. So yea.... Here i am... Man i'm pretty much tired though. And school's starting this monday. Its both a good and a bad thing. Good, cos i know i won't feel so bored staying at home all day. Bad.... I kinda wished there was more holidays... Haha.

Alright thats all for now...

Today marks the 6th month of us being together... (20072007). Haha. Simply means 20/07/2007. These 6 months have been great, really, which none of my previous relationships could ever give me.

Went to watch harry potter at marina square today. Hm... The show's okok, as compared to the last few episodes. Pretty interesting, and sad at the same time though.

Went for dinner at "New York New York" at city link. I've been wanting to try the food there since it opened. So yea... I shan't say much, but the food there is really GREAT!!! I love the pasta sauce, the bolognes, the mushroom soup and the oreo drink. Omg... Its really a heaven for food lovers. Its really worth the money and time there.

Went to esplanade area to jiwang-jiwang there. Hehe... Its been quite some time since i went there with her, and it ever feels so great. I just love spending time with her.

What really made me happy was, the smiles that she showed me. I could really tell that she's really happy, and that's all i ask for. Hehe...

Ok i think i shall stop here, cos yea, kinda tired already...

And oh! The transformers game.... Good shit... I chose to play in the decepticons story. Haha... Love thrashing the hell outta the environment...

Ok thats all for today...

P.S. I love you baby... i really love you loads... =)

I thought i'm going broke... And i thought it'll be quite painful to first ever pay for my upcoming-phone cos i'm gonna change it. But....

I'm gonna get my pay tomorrow, which will be either 50 bucks or 70 bucks from my supervisor. Another better thing is... I'm gonna get a FREE N70!!! Don't ask me how, all i know is, my aunt's gonna give it to me tomorrow. And from that situation, cash keeps on rolling in. Which is, I don't have to pay for my upcoming phone, which will save me 200 bucks!!! OH YEAAAA!!!!!!

So now, my mood is.......

$_$


AHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAA~~~~~!!

I don't know if i should feel happy or sad. School's starting again on the 23rd of July. Which is like, in one week's plus time. Happy cos i know i wont be that bored. Sad cos, 4 months of holiday just passed like that. I guess its time for me to go back to school life for one more year, and be done with it. Guess i'm ready though. Haha.

Went to Roxy Records, and saw the latest release of Vital Remains. Their new album, "Icons Of Evil" kicks metal ass. The previous album "Dechristianize" was more of brutal death metal. This time round, they give me a feeling of "Behemoth". Good stuff. They've added a slight bit of acoustical sound to it, and creating more variations other than just some plain crashing and hitting. I'd rate 5 out of 5 stars for this one.

Ok i've got nothing much to blog about actually. See ya...

Hm went to school yesterday to accompany her. Had dinner at the Mega Food Court (One of my favs). Oh man, the people who tends the stall which sells the Sambal fried rice has changed. Sigh. So has the chef. At first, i didnt know. Then I just went to order sambal fried rice (yummy yummy). When the food came, it was totally different, but still same price. 4 bucks. The portion has shrank. But still, i'd say its very well garnished, smells good and looks good! When i placed it into my mouth... Its still good! Although they used different ingredients, it still satisfied my taste buds. Just that its slightly more spicy this time round. Haha.

For the first time, went bowling with her today cos she asked me to teach her bowling. So yea, at the end of the day, she improved alot. Happy. Hehe... But for me, today was kinda bad. Didn't hit my usual average. Sigh. I even over-strained my right shoulder. Kinda hurts when i move my arm to a certain angle. But oh well...

I've learnt, that i have changed. Of course, for the better. We both are happy about it, and i'm proud that i could do it. =)

My mum called me yesterday, to ask me if i'd like to join my dad for a family dinner. For the first time, i agreed.

I called my aunt last night to help me get a pack of cigarettes, cos i was running out of it. She helped me buy it last night, and she left it on a table outside my room when she reached home. Cos by the time she reached home, i was already dead asleep. When i woke up this morning, my aunt asked if i took the cigarettes, cos it was gone from the table. I didn't take it man. She kinda panicked, and asked my gramps if they saw it. At first, i was afraid that they'll reprimand me. But instead, they didn't, and they were even concerned about what happened. After much search, we all suspected that my brother (that gay) who stole it. We confronted him, and he kinda gave himself away. But he still didn't wanna admit that he took it. Fuck. So forget it la. I was complaining to my girl. She was shocked too, that even siblings would do this kinda thing. I told eugene about it too, and he gave me a very good "revenge plan". We decided to cut our pubic hair, stuff it into a cigarette, and let my bro smoke it. That'll be perfect. I SWEAR, HE'S GONNA SMOKE OUR PUBIC HAIR GOD DAMN IT! Whoever's interested in joining the prank, do let me know.

So went to meet my parents at Hougang Mall for dinner. I saw my sister again, and she's still as adorable and cute as ever. My bro came with his girlfriend. My impression was "Wa lao... Super cheena, and total buang". And my girl's impression was "She looks like she's from malaysia..." They make a good couple though. And my girl popped a very interesting question to me. She asked "How can the girl tahan his body odour?". Haha i laughed sia...

'Twas a pleasant dinner which i had though. I guess i kinda reconciled with my mum whom i used to hate. I don't feel the weight of hatred for her anymore, but still... Scars will always remain. As for my dad... He was showing me this interesting handphone which he got in Thailand. I took it and have a look, with my girl popping her head over to check it out too. The screen saver was a sexy girl in bikini. And i just commented.. "Wa ah pa... Cannot like that la...". Den my girl laughed. Haha... We men have our own needs, that i understand...

At the start of dinner, my sis was sooooo damn shy and didn't wanna face the table. She'd rather eat facing the back, which was the window. Haha. Then halfway through, she managed to get over her shy character, and started dancing. So cute la!!! My girl even went "EEeeeEks... So cuuuuutteee..." Haha. Seriously, she's damn cute.

My girl headed over to my place after dinner, and we had a good talk about the problems that we're facing in our relationship. I'm glad that we're able to realise what we have done wrong, and also being able to talk about it together. This is the kind of love life that i wanna have.

Today's a great sunday; one of the best ever. I love my family, except that fat bugger who thinks he's super cool. Oh yea, he recently changed his hair style, and thinks that he's damn handsome and keep on swinging his head just to let the fringe fall. Cock-headed fat bastard.

Things started to go well today. After having a good talk (or rather, a hurting one) last night, i know my gravest mistake that I've ever committed in a relationship. With her helping to pin-point those out in me, I know which direction i should be heading towards. Alif said this to me "If i ever hear that you lose her, i'm really gonna whack your head." Its a crude comment, but rather, a sentence that really motivates me in a way.

I need time and encouragement to motivate me into being a better boyfriend for her. And yes, i know she'll give me those. I've always thought that I am a better being. But after some reflections being done last night, I realised that i could only be a better friend. Not a boyfriend. And yes, i'm gonna work it out for her, for me, and for us both. I love you baby. I really do.

Today was simple, but pretty fun. Went with alif to "Sheares". Basically, its a shop that sells army-related stuffs. When we entered the shop, i was damn mesmerised by the products they have in the shop. The fucking cool bayonets really caught my eyes. Every single one of them, i scanned through the details of them all. Really kool-ass-shiet stuff man...

After that, headed down to meet Eugene at the Standard Chartered building near boat quay. Since it was his detail and he's bored, we just went down to sort-of accompany him and chill out. Haha. Redhwan came shortly after.

Was dinner time, and headed to the nearby Mac's to fill our stomach. Fuck, I'm never gonna get McSpicy anymore. I don't know why, its just too spicy for me. I was really sweating and tearing when i ate that piece of thing. Seriously man... Even till now, my stomach's still kinda burning. -_-

Today was pretty alright i guess. A new environment to head to on a saturday. Pretty fresh feeling though.

And baby, just to let u know. Letting u go is the hardest thing that i can ever do. Really.

Time and time again. One after another.

Wish i weren't that sensitive. Wish jealousy was never a part of me.

I know of other solutions to that problem. Its just that i don't wanna play the "bad guy" role here.

I wish to be alone for now, tonight.

I'm sick of all these, and knowing that i do not make a good partner in life.

NOTHING you say can make me change that idea of myself.

I seriously wonder what you see in me.

If all doesn't bode well, its time. Time to let everything go.

The End.

Have you ever felt that...

- You have alot of money, but still feel poor at the same time? Like, something's still missing?
- You just had a big plate of food, but still feel hungry after consuming it?
- You have alot of music in your MP3, but you can't find the songs that you really like?
- You have alot of games to choose from, but they're just not your type?

I don't know if these relate to what i'm feeling now. I kind of feel... Empty despite i have everything i need, or most people out there would like to have. I don't know why i feel this way. Infact, i don't really know what i am feeling now.

Its just so... irritating. Honestly, i still feel lonely at times. I really couldn't help it. Sometimes, i really wished you were beside me. I kept it to myself, yes. I wouldn't refer that to being dishonest, but more of sparing a thought for you.

You just got no idea how lonely i feel at times.

I meant no ill intentions, i just need to rant at "something". For I've learnt, that it kinda helps confiding in here... More of, ranting...

Ok the post title is more of Beast Wars, the second generation of Transformers.

Managed to get the tickets for Transformers at 9.10pm today due to the sold-out situation for the 7.45pm slot. Had dinner at BK, and was a really good one. Haha.

Slacked around till Aaron reached, and its about time for movie. And saw the camo-designed pouch which i've been aiming for a damn long time, but still contemplating on whether to get it. I really love it man... Sigh. Man i really couldn't wait to see the transformers in action. Before the show started, i was "practicing" my quick-sketch of perspective view drawing on Alif's phone. Haha... My touch is still there though...

The movie started... Ok there's like too many exciting parts to be mentioned, so i guess i'll just cut it short. The movie is.... FUCKING GOOD!!! Cool shit. Even though the movie didn't follow very closely to the original comic/cartoon, its still damn good! The computer-graphics are really damn superb, marvelous!!! The part where Bumblebee changed into a Chevrolet Camaro, everyone in the cinema was like "woaaaahhhh....". Haha.. Really some cool ass shit man. And they added a touch of comedy in it. Very very very well done movie. I'd personally rate 5 out of 5 stars. Damn good! MUST WATCH!!!

Ok movie ended at 11.50... So damn late la sia. So we decided to walk from PS to Peace Centre to take a cab. When we reached there, the cab queue was damn long. OMG... So we waited for cab at another place. Fucking hell overall waiting time was 1 hour plus before we got into one. First of all, some fucking bitches snatched our cab. Si beh du lan. Den decided to wait for NR6, but the bus just went pass us. So ya lor... Fucked up ar....

My girl ends her attachment contract today! So yea.... She doesn't have to head to that fucked up company anymore! YAY!!!!!!

Man i really love that pouch... Argh... Should i spend on it? Its freaking 25 bucks... Oh man.... >.< Maybe when i get my next allowance, and i might consider again... I really love it... But should i buy it? My current one's torn anyways... Sigh... Somebody tell me? @#$%@#$%%&*@#%$... -_-