The Discipline Of Fire And Demise...

Went for the wake two nights back, and sent my great grandma off yesterday. My grandma brokedown twice in a row... Shattered my heart...

Went out to meet them at vivo last night. He and she has made progression, as in they started to talk to each other more often.

He told me that he felt uneasy about last night. Explaining to me about wat happened. Shit... Hope its all juz a case of "over-sensitivity".

This week alone, i lack a whole load of sleep. Have been sleeping really lil' man...

Yeah! Finally got my Nano. Hehe... Sweet Stuff.... Love it...

Too lazy to blog for now...

Gonna go back to school tomorrow after a 4 days break. Damn sian...

The pact for a pack. Haha... Mission success! *final fantasy 8 winning track plays*

Hell in my house... Haha as fun as ever...

Thou art my queen of the night, for i am the king in thy sight. I mean it my dear. I know we both can't lose each other. =)

YESSAAA!!! Collected around 400 bucks for this year's CNY. Pretty high record so far. Haha. And yessa again!!! Gonna go get my nano on this wednesday with her. YESSA TO THE MAX!!!

Secondly, YESSAAAA again again! Hehe... Its our first month being together. This one month might be short, but it has filled me with emotions that really could make my heart melt. Nevertheless honey, you'll always be my eye candy, girlfriend, and lover. Haha... So sweet la...

In short.... *Super Jumps!!!*

Its been a year since i last saw my baby sis. So sad... She doesn't recognise me at all. Thanks to my mum. Fuck. My sis fears me as a stranger. I'm her own blood brother, but she juz refuses to let me carry her in my arms or even feed her with food. Frankly speaking, i'm pretty hurt... Looks like i'll never have a chance to carry her in my arms...

Anyways, these are the pics i took of her. She looks... Juz so cute...






She's so feminine at such a toddler age. So cute, and loveable. But me being her eldest brother, couldn't carry her in my arms. Fucking sad. Sigh... It'll be another one more year before i could see her again.

Went to my great-grandparents' house... And realised that my great grandma is growing more senile as years go by. Its so sad. When i first saw her, she was smiling and walking around happily. Now, she's chair-ridden. No strength to walk, and couldn't recognise me at all. Her arms are so weak, and her smiles were juz so faint. My heart shatters at that moment... Sigh...

Till the next time... See ya...

A pretty unrelated title for this post actually. Juz some krap that Edwin (Lecturer) came up with...

Went for some seminar yesterda after class yesterday. Ron and edwin drove our class there. On the way there, edwin suddenly mention something about my girl and i. He called her "Ms 2C" (Her class is 2C) ... If you pronounce it fast enough, its Ms Stussy. Edwin said it sounds pretty nice. Haha krap. And it was my turn. He called me "Mr 2E". Again, if pronounced fast... "Mr Dui" (dui is some form of slang in hokkien, which means something like erm.... "Squeeze balls" in hokkien? Haha...) Cock sia... Den they were all lauging in the car.

Reached there... And i was so damn fascinated by wat Vue can do... The power of animation using Vue is crazy. Looks super realistic. I couldn't even tell the difference between animation and reality for a moment. Until the presentor told us so. Holy shiet... Powerful program. And one more thing about the presentor.. He pronounce "Vue" as "Vooeeee" (sounds like some puking sound). Sounds fucking funny la! Everytime the guy says that Vue word, Ron would turn his head around and laugh. Haha! After the seminar ended, Kent, Ron and Edwin (Lecturers) also imitated the presentor's way of pronouncing Vue. Laughed our asses off.

Went home after that to change and have dinner before heading out to play Basketball as usual. Shiok. Haha. Went to eat supper as usual... While slacking, took some pics...



Courtesy of Aaron, this is how i'll react if someone makes me pissed.... "WHAT?!?!!!" Haha... Eugene taught me that actually which looks pretty fun....



Another mon-ta-ge of us all... Courtesy of Eugene...

Alright thats all guys... See ya...

She gave me a surprise today by popping outta my house this morning at around 8am. Was supposed to meet her at 8.20 at bishan, but well... I was about to go get my boots outside, when i received a call. Its from her... And as i was holding the phone and walking outside, i saw some familiar figure... ITS HER!!! OMG! Shock of my life baby... So sweet la...

Went to school together, and everything went well. Except when i see that Thai mofo, i'll be so turned off. Si beh act lor. Buay tahan. Really hate him to the core. Total buang one... Nevermind. Fuck him.

Again, Ah Hong "chut pattern". EVERYTIME SIA!!! Everytime when it comes to presentation, surely got some fucking funny joke. And guess wat he did today? He did the powerpoint presentation, and at the last slide, he put a pic of the artist. The pic looks like some kinda orbituary pic la! Den the whole 3 classes laughed like mad, especially my class. Wa buay tahan... Nia eh... Sabrina Koh juz had to drag the lesson till 6pm. It was supposed to end at 4.30... Fuck.

Went to eat with her at Carl's Jr. The portion was crazy. Even she and i can't finish a set meal together... Oh man... Here's a pic of it...



Went to esplanade, but changed our mind and went back to bishan park. There jiwang jiwang again la. Hehe... Exchanged pressies... Here's wat i got...



A rugged looking belt, and a key chain. Both looks sweet. The belt is like, so my style la! And she made me realise something... The design of the belt, is the same as my Zippo! Oh man... Love you lots hun... Haha. Love the belt too...

Den yea... When it was time to go off, took some pics to "remember" that date...



Some sweetie pic. Kinda like it... I find that she looks.. Cute in this pic. HAHA... Chubby kiddish face. Pinch-able eh?



Comparing the crosses... Haha... Bought that for her. Looks good on her too. Thats the best part. Haha...

Alright.... Now its time to end this post... Nevertheless, Happy Valentine's day my love...

I hate it the idea of "All have to change just cos of one...". Damn sian of it... I'm getting sick of it. One day.... Juz one day... I'll blow up. Your attitude is so wrong. Do consider changing it for the better. All of us feel that way. A good example... "Don't request for help until you've tried, or you'll NEVER learn."

To those girls who stereotype guys. I dare tell u, that there are nice guys out there too. Don't judge us juz because you've been thru ALOT of failed relationships. You failed, may not be cos of the guy. Have you thought of your being? To me, you take things for granted. Now, you can't blame the guy for being a jerk can you? We too, are humans. Not animals. And we being guys, aren't your animals. We have feelings. Don't blame us all for things that go wrong. Take a good look at thyself.

And thanks babe. Thanks for being with me and accepting me for who i am. Alot of people would say "Aiya... Initial stage ma. Of course so loving la...". I'm not that kind of guy. Who u see me as now, would be the guy whom you'll see for the whole life time. I am me. I don't show love cos its the "honeymoon" period. I know myself much more than others. And to that "friend", this is a message for you... "Don't tell my girl how to love her guy. Because she respects her guy more than you respect guys. And also, don't be a know-it-all. Cos you know no shit about me."

Yes honey... You're all i want in my love life. Haha.

This is a pic which was taken yesterday at the Buffet...



I really felt comfortable with her family... Nice family. Hehe...

Wish i could be a part of their family...

Yea... Today's the day. It was her bro's birthday yesterday, and her mum decided to hold a mini-celebration today. So yea... Gave my girl a surprise by popping outta nowhere when she stepped outta house. Haha. Went down to velocity at novena... Seriously, there's nothing there... Sian...

So yea... Time's up, and went to meet her mum and her brothers for the buffet dinner at Vienna (If i remembered correctly). Initially i thought i'm gonna be quiet there. And when we got our food, we started chatting and eating. Her family's so.... So friendly... I like it. I felt comfortable. And when we got our drinks, "cheers!!" was wat we said... Wat her mum said, really struck me... "Lets stay this way and hope we'll have the chance like this again...". It really comforted me. A big thanks to her mum who's so friendly, and accepts me for who i am, and who also gives us the "greenlight" of being together. Hehe...

Dinner was great, and yea... Went to jiwang-jiwang with her again. Never fails to make me feel so... Tender. With love, baby...

Met Charlotte at hougang plaza to "collect my debt". Haha... After that, eugene came and we slacked there till around 6pm before we left for town.

Went to meet my girl at far east, and headed to Inokii. Woah... Lucky thing i went there man. Or else, i wouldn't have been exposed to the band called "Vital Remains". Thanks to Chan for letting me experiment with the band. After sampling their album "Dechristianize", i juz bought the limited edition CD. Oh shit... Its fucking good...

Alif came shortly after that, and yea... Had dinner and slacked around town before we went off...

Spent some precious time with her alone nearby her house... Baby... It was really nice. Juz the two of us alone... I love that feeling... But i love you more... HAHA!

As per usual wednesdays, went with her to school... As per usual wednesdays, we're having sleepy classes...

Finally Sabrina Koh accepted my stuffs for research studies. Haha...

Ended school and headed towards penin to buy my pants. Got this pair which i really like. Some tight fit cutting one. Hehe... After that, went to funan to check out Nano's accessories. Aiming for that acrylic case. Hehe. Went to have dinner after that, and realised that we bought the same food. Damn... We're seriously so alike. May be a good thing... Haha.

Headed to esplanade to chill out and spend some jiwang time together. Haha. During that time, she filled me with a feeling that i've not felt for years... This warmth of closeness. She placed my head on her laps to let me rest. Now, when the hell was the last time i did that? Sheesh.... Years back man.... Took another pic... Which i kinda like...



Eh come on la guys. I dont know how to smile to a camera. Its juz... Not me. Unless you happen to catch me smiling or laughing away. I never looked good in pics... Sigh. So wasted... I juz feel that i look so ugly in pics... Somebody slash me.... =(

Wanted to go town after class today, but no one seems to be able to accompany me there. Hate going out alone... So juz planned to go home. When i plugged into my MP3, i realised that my earphones are spoilt. One side is juz blank. Sucks. So yea... Juz planned to head to town to get a set of earphones and at the same time, collect my Behemoth CD.

Went to HMV at orchard, and happened to come across Creative earphones. I juz thought to myself... "Since i'm gonna get a new MP3 soon, juz make do with this cheap set of earphones which only cost 17 bucks." Paid for it, and plugged in immediately. Lil' did i know... The sound quality of this set really rocks my ass off. Total loud bass with hollow distortion. Fuck. Its juz so perfect. Haha.

Headed down to Inokii and collected my CD and at the same time, placed order for 2 tees that i wanted to get. Will only be able to collect after CNY though. Haha...

Went to shop around for *ahem*... So yea... Finally got wat's on my mind. Sweet.... *surprise*. First time that i actually know wat i wanna get for a present. And... I really spent time to choose the good ones. I hope she ain't reading my blog.... Or at least, this post. *Surprise surprise!*. I guess i really love her alot though its juz the third week of our relationship.

On the way back home, i came past this route that we actually would frequent when i send her home. I stood there for a few seconds, stationary. Flash of thoughts came past my mind. I guess i really love her alot, and that she's a big part of my life. This, "I love you..." is all i can say to you. Simple as it sounds, infinite passions contained.

Sheesh... Tried so fucking hard to do my research studies shit. Damn. Really can't... No blardy info about it boy... So pissed....

Thoughts of the day... Tormental memories once struck me. She says "Forgive, but perhaps not forget...". It made sense. I guess... Its time to forgive my "mum" for wat she did? I juz don't wanna hate anymore. Neither do i need her love. I guess... Forgiving her is my first step... A very hard step to be exact... I know. My quote, "Accept, and be accepted. Respect, and be respected."... Its time that i should do something about my hatred and angst... Thank you honey... For waking me up. =)

Man... Dunno wats wrong with me these few days. Over-sleeping seems to occur to me often nowadays. Sheesh. Kinda irritating.

Yessa!!! Gonna get my Behemoth CD and T-shirt (Zos Kia Cultas) soon... Sweet... Have been aiming on them both for a long time... And its time to get em. Most probably will get the hammerfall t-shirt too. The design of the shirt looks damn sweet. Nice. "We are the templars of steel. The taste of blood, is the taste of metal.". Haha... Nah juz some random phrases.

I Love you baby. I know u wanna get me stuffs which i really like/love, but too bad, i'm faster than thou! Hehe... Its the thought that counts aint it? You yourself are already my present. Its good enough. You're already my walking present that i could solely embrace. Its really good enough honey. =)

Man i really can't wait to get my Ipod Nano 4GB. Sheesh.... I could hear it calling my name everyday... I'm comin' ta getcha baby!!! Only... After CNY. Hehe...

Once again, as above, so below...

Went out with my girl to town today. Headed to starbucks at suntec to chill for awhile as my craving for chocolate came again. Haha. So yea... Chilled there till around 4+. Went with her to shop for her clothes at Zara in orchard. Sweet... We both agreed on this piece which will look good on her. Haha. Kinda same taste i guess?

Met her mum there... I would say, she's damn friendly. Man this is the first time i see a mum, who's really so friendly. She even shook hands with me, and offered me some japanese cheesecakes. Oh man... Nice.

Shortly after that, headed to meet the members at HMV. Haha... I even asked eugene to help me get hold of the Poisonblack CD first juz incase its gone. Reached there, and i kena a small prank. I panickly went to the metal section to look for my Poisonblack, and i couldn't find it. Eugene said it was gone... For a moment, i was like, damn sian. Giving me the funny look, he suddenly took out this disc which looks so familiar... FUCK!!! ITS THE POISONBLACK DISC!!! Asshole.. Haha. I quickly made my payment for it, and went to the movie DVD section. Aaron got the show "It". Planned to head to dennis' place to watch it.

Reached there, had the dopest chicken chop and headed up to watch the show. Good shit i would say. Pretty draggy to some, but i personally found it interesting. Cos it shows the whole story/process of how each kid gain their fear from the clown. Good shiet.

And final comments for the day... YESSA! Finally... Poisonblack is mine! Next up, i would wanna get the disc by the band "Behemoth", titled "Demigod". Sweet...

First of all... Most of my illnesses are gone. Wats left now, is the phlegm thing which causes cough. But aint that bad cos i'm not like, coughing every minute... Shiok gila!!!

Went to school today, and yea.. Seek juz had to continue the "hidden" joke. Dunno why the hell, she called me a "hidden-butch". She claims that i am one though. And therefore, she gave most of the classmates a hidden nick name also.

Asri - Hidden Gay
Hye Yung - Hidden Lesbian
Zhen Hong - Hidden Girl

Laughed our ass off while talking about the "xiao mao mi" (Lil' pussy) joke also. Na beh... Can die laughing in the class sia... Love 2E.

Went to play basketball after that. Finally, the raining season is over. Sweet weather, windy and cooling. Perfect for a game... I would say, i'm really damn satisfied with my performance today. Sweet... And yea... I managed to play rough for the first time. Cos yea... I kinda dislike this small fucker who thinks he's damn good. So, purposely went rough on him. Revenge is ever so sweet to me. Love it. Vengeance... Its one of my sadistic desires. Of course, vengeance only to those who've done harm to people around me. Haha...